Resuscitate
by BeMyOwnMarvel
Summary: Caroline said he'd better wake up before he loses everything. He's more awake than he's been in a while, and he's not going to lose Bonnie again. But it IS Mystic Falls after all...easier said than done.
1. Realize

Note: I don't own TVD or it's characters. If I did, this would be a very different show. Reviews are love.

* * *

What's the appropriate amount of time a girl should wait to approach her brother after he catches her making out with her boyfriend's – former boyfriend's? - brother? Especially considering said boyfriend's brother has given Jeremy every reason to want to use him for target practice. Elena sat herself down on Jeremy's bed, trying to pretend that the last few hours had not happened.

His back faced her as he put the last of his clothing away in his closet. "Don't worry, Elena. I won't say a word. You're more than capable of figuring this out on your own," Jeremy said as he turned to his sister and walked back to his suitcase. She nodded uncomfortably, understanding that this was not a conversation he was willing to have at the moment without berating her.

Her eyes fell to the suitcase he had just removed more belongings from, pausing at sheets of paper lining the space underneath. She pulled them out and found herself looking at the drawn faces of her parents and the family. "I see you kept up with your drawing. These are great, Jer." As she leafed through the drawings, she halted as the image of her best friend stared back at her, wearing a smile that seemed so foreign now. She looked up at Jeremy, whose eyes were fixed on the drawings.

"It's weird, you know. When I settled into Denver, I kept feeling like I'd left something important behind. Like there was a void. Then it was just a face that would flash in my mind and disappear before I could figure out who it belonged to. Before I knew it, I was drawing it. And then I realized it was all because I was missing who it belonged to. I haven't stopped thinking about her since. And there isn't really a damn thing I can do about it, is there?"

"Well, why not?"

"Because I betrayed her trust. Because I hurt her. And then I just left. I don't even know why I did it. When I think about it now, none of it makes any sense. I never wanted to hurt Bonnie. I wasn't in love with Anna. And she wasn't in love with me, either. We were together because we cared about each other and we both felt alone. That was it. I wouldn't have hurt Bonnie over that. It's like I had no control over my own thoughts and my own actions. What if there was really something else going on? And then leaving?" Elena watched Jeremy's agitation increase as he began to pace, becoming more nervous herself. "I wouldn't have done that either. Not with everything going on here, and with you guys in danger. Why would I just abandon you? I wouldn't choose that. I wouldn't-"

Jeremy turned back to the pictures of Bonnie and froze. How was it that he was only just realizing? She wouldn't have, not again. Not after the last time. He looked at her sister. A guilt-ridden face. He was wrong. She had. Again.

"You're kidding me." Jeremy reached for his backpack, turned and stormed out of the room. Elena jumped off the bed and rushed after him down the stairs.

"Jer, wait! Listen to me! We were just trying to protect you! Alaric and Damon and I-"

"Damon! Of course Damon was involved! Because when it comes to taking people's choices away, not respecting them, yet jumping at the opportunity to get in good with you, Damon's the guy to call."

"We just wanted you safe, Jeremy." Elena's words sounded hollow to her own ears.

"Right, and I was _so_ safe with the Original pretending to be my friend." Jeremy finally turned to her, daring her to keep trying to convince him she was right.

"I...No. You're right. Bonnie was right. I should have listened to her..."

"Wait, where does Bonnie fit into this? Why would it matter to her?"

"She was upset with me for taking your choice away. But I was so sure I was doing the right thing for you."

So Bonnie of all people had been the one to defend him. "Yeah. You realize that you trying to do the 'right thing' ends up getting people hurt?" Jeremy grabbed his jacket and headed to the door. "It's not just you and the Salvatores affected by all this, Elena. So you and the Salvatores shouldn't be the only ones making decisions for the rest of us."

* * *

Bonnie awoke to the distant sound of hammering and turned to the clock on her nightstand. She'd overslept, something she'd been doing consistently for the past few days. She pushed herself out of bed as she caught sight of the black beaded dress Caroline has dropped off the previous day. It didn't matter how much Caroline insisted; there was no way she'd go to the decade dance. How could she go to a school party and smile and laugh and enjoy herself when all she felt like doing was crawling back into bed and hoping it would swallow her whole?

An hour later, Bonnie found herself trudging down the stairs toward the source of the hammering: the backyard where Jamie was knocking away at the siding of her house. She could have sworn that once Abby left, he'd want nothing to do with Bonnie, that he'd blame her for the trouble that had entered their lives and for Abby's death and transition. Which is why she was stunned when, the day after Bonnie's "visit" with Klaus, Jamie showed up at her front door, telling her that no matter what his and her connections to Abby were, no matter how dysfunctional the relationship, if Abby was important to Bonnie, then Bonnie was important to Jamie. He didn't feel right about staying at the farm house Abby had abandoned. He wasn't her brother, but he was her confidante, one who took her side, and he had pretty much become akin to family, so Bonnie invited him to stay with her. It wasn't as though her father would mind. He'd have to be home or keep in touch with her for that to happen.

"You know, you've made my house practically unrecognizable," Bonnie told him as she walked out.

Jamie looked down at her from the ladder, returning her smile. "Well, you have your secret super identity as a witch. I have mine as Ty Pennington," he joked.

"Easy, let's not announce that to the neighbors, okay? But really, Jamie, you don't need to do all this."

"I don't mind at all. Plus, no offense, but it's a wonder this place hasn't fallen apart by now." Jamie climbed down the ladder and followed Bonnie into the house. "You know, what I _do _mind is this whole mope-around-the-house, 'I just don't _want_ to go to the dance' business you've got going on."

Bonnie frowned at him. "Wait, how did you- Caroline, dammit..."

"She wants you to let loose after everything you've put yourself through. And I think she's got the right idea. Come on, it'll be fun. Remember fun? You know, that thing that makes the corners of your mouth go up? We humans call that 'smiling'." A smile of his own played on Jamie's lips.

"Oh haha. Everyone will have a date, and after Jeremy...I'm just not in the mood."

"I'll be your date." Bonnie stopped in the middle of gathering her belongings for school and shot him a look. "Okay, relax. Can't a friend ask a friend to a dance _as friends_? I just want you to get away from all this chaos without having to hide in your house from it. And so what if things ended badly for you and this Jeremy guy? He's gone, right? You'll find someone who treats you right, Bonnie. But only if you get out of this house for more than just class and fighting the big bad hybrid. Think about it?"

Bonnie sighed. "Fine, I'll think. But just warning you, the chances of my 'hell no' turning into a 'yes' are minimal at best." She headed for the door.

"Have a good day at school," Jamie teased.

Bonnie rolled her eyes. Jamie's words had carved a dent in her reservations. That is until she was at her locker hours later and happened to look down the hall, inadvertently catching the eye of the boy she hadn't been able to get over despite the time that had passed. Jeremy shot her a tentative smile, one that said "Hi", "I missed you", and "Please don't hate me anymore" all at once as he maneuvered around other students, and Bonnie found herself confused all over again.

* * *

Note: Okay, not the best, but I needed to start somewhere. Beremy angst in the works, and we'll see why Jeremy couldn't control the Anna kiss :) Let me know what you think!


	2. Reinstate

She knew Jeremy's move to Denver was indefinite, but Bonnie was sure Elena had meant for it to last longer than this. Now here he was in front of her after – rather remarkably, considering all that had happened since he left – just a few weeks. And after recent events, it was all she could do not to step into the arms she'd found solace in a few months ago. Thinking of how he'd made her well being a priority in the face of threat after threat and how safe he'd made her feel, she made to move toward him.

That is, until her thoughts turned to Anna. Bonnie stood her ground.

"Hey." Awkward pause. "I missed you."

"Hey. I...I thought you were moving to Denver for good."

It wasn't quite the response Jeremy had hoped for. _Beggars can't be choosers. _It surprised him that she'd talk to him at all. "Yeah, well I didn't realize I was being forced to move without my consent."

Well, at least Bonnie didn't have to pretend anymore. "She told you," she said as she decided to fall into step with him walking to the exit.

"After I figured it out just a little too late, yeah. Not the last mistake she made, either."

Her eyes shot up at him as she frowned. "What do you mean?" she asked warily.

"It seems she's got more than just a thing for both Salvatores now. Caught them making out." The tightening of his jaw made it clear which Salvatore Jeremy would rather see his sister with.

Bonnie sighed as she pushed the door open and they stepped out to the schoolyard. She noticed Elena and Caroline deep in conversation several yards away and could guess the subject of their conversation. "I guess Damon can do just about anything without losing favor with Elena. Figures."

"I ran into Matt earlier. He told me about your mom." Jeremy slowed to a stop. He looked at Bonnie closely, studying her face. "Bonnie, I am so sorry."

Her eyes looked forlornly around them as she shrugged. "Can't say it's surprising. Just can't believe that before that night, I actually thought they had a little more consideration for the rest of us." Disappointment was replaced with anger as she looked back to Jeremy. "Then again, two vampires, each with a history of inhumanity...What can you expect, right?"

Jeremy shook his head slightly. "What they did...I can't even begin to..."

"Yeah." Caroline caught her eye and noticed she was talking to Jeremy. Bonnie could almost hear Caroline's voice in her head. _Play it cool, Bonnie. Not too cool, but cool enough. _Caroline smiled at her encouragingly.

"But it's not just that, Bonnie. It's everything." Her gaze returned to Jeremy as he took a cautious step closer to her. If he noticed her stiffen, he didn't show it. "I'm so sorry for hurting you. For what I did behind your back. For taking so long to tell you the truth. For not being here when you were going through all this with Abby. For everything."

Bonnie could hear in his voice how his actions since the night she brought him back to life had plagued him. But what was she supposed to say? That she forgave him? That she could let it go? All she knew was that she wasn't ready for either, so she stayed silent and decided to hear him out.

"I wish I knew the best way for me to explain to you. I still can't put together what exactly happened that night. Sort of like being a passenger in a car that's lurching out of control. I knew what was happening. I could see it, but I had no control over it. And I know it sounds insane and hollow and I know it doesn't erase everything that's happened, but...I still care about you, Bonnie. More than I can explain."

By now Jeremy was so close that Bonnie had to tilt her head up to look him in the eye. "And I don't expect your forgiveness or your trust, but I just need you to know this: I would never knowingly and intentionally hurt you. You mean so much to me, and I plan on making up for everything for as long as I have to so that you never have to doubt how I feel about you. I'm not letting anything hurt you again. Especially not me. So I'm here, in whatever capacity you need me to be."

Everything Jeremy had just said was threatening to sway her emotions before she could reason with it all, and she knew she had to remove herself from the situation lest she do something she'd later regret. "I should get going. I need to go pick up some stuff Caroline needs for the dance."

He understood this was her way of saying she needed time. "Right. The dance. Are you going with anyone?" Bonnie shot him a warning look and he put his hands up in most defense, trying to lighten the mood. "Just asking. I should go, too. Caroline's got Matt and me helping with the set up."

Bonnie chuckled. "Sounds like Caroline. Later." She turned to her car and made it a few steps before she stopped and turned. Jeremy waited for her words. "I missed you, too, Jer. And thank you, for what you said."

Jeremy watched her get into her car and drive away. He turned to make his way to the gym to set up when he noticed that Caroline stood a few feet away with a smirk on her face. She'd obviously heard the whole conversation. "You know, you have to earn back what you had with her."

"Yeah. I know." He started toward the school.

"But it's a start," he heard her say behind him. "Hang in there, Gilbert." He smiled. It was nice to know someone had faith in them, and he appreciated Caroline for it.

He kept that last bit in mind when drill sergeant Caroline yelled at him and Matt during set up later on. It was good to be home.


	3. Reevaluate

If this had been a serious date, Jamie would have been on his best behavior. However, like Abby, Bonnie had become a very good friend to him. Which was, of course, why he felt no shame in rapping obnoxiously at her bedroom door, urging her to finish up so they could leave while there was still a dance left to enjoy.

"Almost done, calm down," Bonnie stated through gritted teeth. After dropping off the boxes Caroline had asked for and seeing the gym decorated, she felt even less of an inclination to attend. Not that the gym looked bad; in fact it was quite the contrary. The perfection of the decor felt superficial in the midst of everything the group had been dealing with lately. Bonnie checked her reflection one last time in the mirror and noted how her appearance reflected her thoughts on the gym's decor. She was already prepared to take down her pin curls and call it a night.

By the time Bonnie had been dancing with Jamie for some time after he'd dragged her onto the dance floor, she had loosened up more. In fact, she was finally starting to feel something resembling her old self again, the one who existed in the pre-Stefan-Elena-Damon era. Jamie was making her feel like a little kid again, like the girl who used to danced to Madonna in Grams' living room on the rare occasion that Bonnie was able to visit her without her dad finding out. And she was becomingly increasingly grateful for it.

"Tell me now that you regret coming, I dare you," Jamie challenged, and as hard as Bonnie tried to frown at him, she found herself laughing genuinely for the first time in a long time. The smile lingered on her face when she spotted Jeremy, looking impossibly handsome in his 1920's suit.

Damon had just walked in and interrupted Stefan and Elena, and with their history of decade dances, Jeremy knew that this couldn't be a good sign. He pushed his away across the dance floor and was caught off-guard when he bumped into a young man who seemed just a few years too old to be there dancing with Bonnie. Then again, Damon was always at these dances, too, so age didn't really mean much here.

"Sorry- Oh, hey, Bonnie." Jeremy had figured she would not come alone tonight, but he still found it unsettling to see another guy's hands on her waist. More importantly, it was _another_ _guy_ making her laugh and giving her a reprieve from the hell her life had become. Jeremy put on a straight face and put out his hand. "I'm Jeremy. You must be Bonnie's date tonight."

So this was the Jeremy he'd heard so much about from Bonnie. The one who had made out with his ex while dating Bonnie. Jamie had no intention of making this easy for him. "Jamie. And yeah," he said as one hand grasp Jeremy's while the other wrapped around Bonnie's shoulder. "Glad to say I am." He looked down dotingly at Bonnie, who was looking between the two guys, not sure whether to laugh or to reproach Jamie for messing with Jeremy. As gratifying as it was to see Jeremy squirm after what he'd done to her, she wasn't the type to play games to stir up drama. She ducked her head to hide her amusement, only to notice Jeremy's hand.

"Why are you still wearing your ring? Didn't Elena tell you?"

"Yeah, I know all about Alaric. When my sister stops hanging around vampires, I'll stop wearing it." He nodded toward the entrance from where Elena had just left with both Salvatores. He turned to Jamie. "You're a really lucky guy." Before passing by, he lowered his head toward Bonnie's ear as he gently squeezed her upper arm. "You look amazing tonight." With that, he walked past the two to follow his sister out.

"So _that's_ Jeremy Gilbert."

"Yeah. What the hell were you doing?"

Jamie continued to stare at the entrance. "I have no idea what you're talking about." Bonnie shook her head, smirking.

* * *

An hour later, Bonnie could feel the beginnings of the blisters that would emerge on her feet tomorrow. Jamie set down a cup of punch in front of her, downing his as he sat next to her at the table. "I haven't danced like that in a long time. As much as I hate to admit it, you were right to make me come here tonight," Bonnie said to him. "Thanks."

Jamie smiled. "You're very welcome. Your friends seem pretty great."

"They're the most important thing in the world to me." She watched Caroline and Tyler dance.

"Though you've got to admit," Jamie lowered his voice, crossing his arms over the table, "it's pretty crazy. I mean, you've got vampires and witches and werewolves. Abby only ever talked about all this when she was drunk, so I just blamed it on too much gin and tonic."

"Yeah, I used to think the same thing about my Grams, that she was just too drunk to remember that witches don't exist. Except that they do."

"Well, it's a good reminder of just how normal a guy I am."

"A normal guy wouldn't want anything to do with me. If my own dad can't accept this part of who I am, I could never have expected anyone else to. And yet, you did." Bonnie looked directly at him. "Why did you?"

Jamie paused, contemplating her question. "I guess, since I've known Abby for so long, I figured any child of hers couldn't possibly be so bad. And I'm about 99.9% sure I'm right."

"Yeah? What happened to the other 0.1%?" They both laughed.

"In all seriousness, Bonnie. If your dad doesn't see how lucky he is to have you, he's missing out. It's on him, not on you. I mean-"

"Hate to break up this truly touching little heart-to-heart." A raven-haired head stuck itself obnoxiously between the them and two icy blue eyes turned to Bonnie from only a few inches away. "We have a problem." Damon beckoned for Bonnie to come with him. Bonnie clenched her jaw and relaxed only when Jamie squeezed her hand. They followed Damon out of the gym.

* * *

"What is taking so long? All spells have a loophole."

Bonnie had been chanting for several minutes now and didn't seem to be making the slightest bit of progress, even with Klaus' grating criticism. Here stood three vampires and three humans watching Bonnie become increasingly frustrated with Esther's spell work.

Jamie had never seen a witch in action before and stared bemused at Bonnie. "She does this all the time, right?"

"Yeah," said Jeremy. _If only he knew_. As always, Jeremy was captivated by the glow that seemed to envelop Bonnie as she worked her magic. However, even though he probably could have watched her forever, he knew that right now, they didn't have the time for that. Not to mention, he really didn't want to see Bonnie push herself to the point of bleeding - especially in front of Klaus - trying to counteract an ancient witch's magic.

"Matt and I can go ahead and stop Esther ourselves before anything happens."

"It's suicide, Jeremy," came Stefan's voice from the rear of the room. A gust of air caught everyone's attention as Klaus flashed to Jamie.

"Suicide," he said as he grabbed Jamie by the throat, "would be to cross me. Work your magic, witch, before I start killing people you hold dear."

"Let him go!" Bonnie could feel her own throat constricting watching Klaus squeeze Jamie's.

Stefan knew that in Bonnie's current situation, to lose yet another person she cared for would be the beginnings of losing herself. Despite recent events, he still cared for her and wanted to remain a friend to her. "Don't be stupid, Klaus. Bonnie doesn't care about us." He looked between her and the ancient hybrid. "The only reason she's helping is to protect Caroline and Tyler. You start killing people she cares about, she'll tell us all to go to hell." Stefan looked to Bonnie, trying to silently communicate that despite what his recent actions had conveyed to her, he was - now more than ever - on her side.

Klaus released Jamie. Bonnie remained silent. "Look, Matt and I will go armed. We don't have a better plan right now." Jeremy looked at Matt for confirmation and the two walked out without waiting for anyone to stop them.

"Fix this, Bonnie," Klaus threatened before walking out, Damon and Stefan following behind them. Bonnie hurried to Jamie.

"Don't worry, I'm fine." Jamie rubbed his throat and laughed it off. "Go on. Do what you have to do."

Bonnie smiled sadly. He really didn't know what he was getting himself into. "Go home, Jamie. You shouldn't be around this."

"Bonnie, look, this isn't your-"

"No, Jamie, listen to me. I should never have pulled you into this. Stick around this much longer and you'll end up just like Abby." Bonnie's throat began to constrict again, and it had nothing to do with Klaus. "Please."

She waited for him to nod and leave before letting herself drop to the couch, trying to gather herself before attempting once again to help the three vampires she currently liked least.


	4. Release

Note: Thank you guys SO MUCH for the reviews. You have no idea how glad I am that you like this. Please keep them coming and let me know how it's going!

* * *

He didn't want to let go, as though holding on to Alaric would allow him to keep the last father figure he had. But the longer he held on, the harder he knew it would be to accept his death. Jeremy pulled back and turned to leave.

"Jer, wait."

"Alaric-"

"No, listen. Elena, could you give us a moment?" Elena nodded and left. Alaric turned to Jeremy.

"No speeches about manning up, okay? Just...You're not alone. Know that. You have your sister, even if you're not her biggest fan right now. You have your friends, who are really the only family you need. You have a girl who's still in love you and will keep loving you even when you screw up big time." Jeremy scoffed.

"You're underestimating her. You know, the only reason you came back to life that night was because she told the witches she loves you? She thought the consequence would be her life for yours. That's why what you did hurt her so much. Because she thinks she fell for a guy who only_ let her believe_ that he'd fallen for her, too." Jeremy fell silent, stunned.

"I hid things from Jenna. I hurt her. Lucky for me, I had the opportunity to make it up to her before her death. I moved past everything I'd been through with Isobel to give myself to Jenna completely, flaws and screw ups and all. And we could have been happy, if I'd just done that sooner. We lost time because I was scared and took the easy way out.

"Now, I don't believe for a second that you would just cheat on a girl like Bonnie, not after everything you've been through together. And after dealing with Esther tonight, I'm sure there was more to that night than any of us realize. But you owe it to Bonnie to make it up to her. I'm telling you this now because I've never seen you happier and more at peace than you've been with her. And that's what I want for you guys. In all this insanity, to find a little peace. Consider it my dying wish."

The two men stared at each other, each willing the other to live and keep fighting. "Come on," Alaric led Jeremy out, only to find Elena, Stefan, Damon, Caroline, Tyler, Matt, Bonnie, and Meredith waiting for him. Jeremy joined them, standing by Bonnie. The two locked eyes for a second, and Jeremy knew that even if Alaric had not been Bonnie's guardian, with his death Bonnie was also losing family tonight. They all faced Alaric, a silent goodbye lingering in the space between them. Alaric nodded in thanks and retreated to his final resting spot.

* * *

Bonnie was silent during the entire ride, wiping tears she had fought to hold in since leaving the woods. Thinking of Elena and Jeremy, she didn't know what to do. Elena had lost another parent, but Stefan had swooped in to comfort her, leading her back to his car and to the school. Jeremy had lost another loved one, but he had left with Matt, and she didn't know whether she should even go to him. Once Alaric had gone back inside, Jeremy had avoided eye contact with everyone, especially her. So she'd answered when Jamie had called her for the sixth time since he'd left the school and took him up on his offer to pick her up.

Bonnie opened her door and Jamie followed. "Thanks for giving me a ride home."

"No problem." The mood between them had changed, no longer as jovial as it had been before. "Thank you, for protecting me."

"Apparently, it's what I do." Bonnie sounded resigned, and it worried Jamie.

"You know it wasn't your fault."

"It doesn't make it any easier."

"You really are amazing. Your friends, your family...they don't even realize."

Bonnie shrugged. "Sometimes I think I'd settle for ordinary."

Jamie smiled bitterly. "Your dad's not coming back to town for a while, is he? I was thinking, maybe I should stay here longer. I don't think you should be alone here."

Bonnie began to nod, then hesitated. "Actually, I think you should leave as soon as possible." Jamie didn't understand.

"As long as the Originals believe you're important to me, your life is in danger. You need to get away from all of this, as far away as you can, and just stay under the radar. Go back to UNC-"

"No, I can't just leave you here in the middle of all this, Bonnie-"

"There's nothing you can do here. Trust me. Don't take a year off just to stay with me. Live on campus or get an apartment close to it and just stay there. Mind your own business, keep a low profile, and just stay away from anything having to do with any of this."

It was a mistake to think she could have any sort of relationship with the Originals around. Family, friends...everyone she could ever care about was automatically in danger just by knowing her. She couldn't let Jamie get hurt on her account, not like Abby, and not like Grams. She looked at him imploringly. "Please, just..." Her eyes began to tear. "Just go."

Jamie stood his ground for a moment. He saw Abby's stubborn streak in her. "Fine. But you listen to me. You know how to get in touch with me. I'm sure even if I move, you can find me. Supernatural GPS and all," he chuckled. He stepped closer. "Bonnie, I'm your friend. If you need anything..._anything_...you let me know, okay?"

"Okay," she whispered as he pulled her into his arms. But she knew no matter how much trouble she was in, she never would. She would lose a second member of her makeshift family tonight.

* * *

Thoughts of all that had transpired kept him awake as Jeremy lay on Matt's couch. He didn't want to be alone at home with Elena, especially considering at least one of the Salvatore brothers would keep her company tonight. Months ago, he would have found himself in Bonnie's house, talking to her about childhood moments and future dreams, anything to avoid the present. But he had lost the right to that in one haunted night. So here he was instead, drawing unwittingly on a napkin from the Grille. Alaric's words rang in his mind as questions about Esther confounded him.

She wanted Bonnie to herself. That was the only explanation he could think of. Bonnie _had_ traded herself for him the night she saved him. Esther wanted to cut Bonnie's ties to everyone else she cared for so that she could wedge herself into the younger witch's life and take control of it.

Well, that wasn't something he could allow to happen. He and Bonnie had both been played time and time again, all for the sake of satisfying someone else's wishes, be it an Original's, a Salvatore's, or Elena's. He would fight harder this time, for her and for them.

Jeremy exhaled deeply and glanced at the napkin. He'd drawn a crossbow.


	5. Revive

Note: Sorry for not updating in FOREVER! I really appreciate you guys reading what I had so far. I just kind of got stuck because I couldn't decide what direction to take the story in, plus life got in the way. So hopefully this isn't a let down. As always, reviews are appreciated :)

* * *

_Please. PLEASE. _She could form no more coherent thought at the moment. Jeremy's body lay motionless on the forest floor, and it seemed that Bonnie's magic would not extend far enough to revive his heart. So she resorted to a more human approach: beating the hell out of him.

"Jeremy! JEREMY! Please!" She didn't know with whom she was pleading; it didn't seem like any force in the universe was on her side as she continued pummeling his chest with the hopes of restarting his heart.

Jeremy gasped as his eyes shot open. The relief nearly made Bonnie collapse as she helped him sit up. She pressed her forehead against his, the connection grounding her and reassuring her. He was alive.

"It's okay," Jeremy breathed out. "I'm okay." The adrenaline from the past couple of moments faded, and the two found themselves simply staring at each other. If ever there was a time to make a move, now was it. Jeremy scanned her face, opening his mouth to speak when Bonnie pulled away.

"We should go check to see what happened, make sure everyone's okay." Bonnie stood up and made to get her bag. "My phone's dying; I can't call them. Maybe you should call." She started walking toward the end of the woods, refusing to see if he was following.

"Bonnie-"

"If it didn't work, we're out of options. I didn't even ask Abby for details about when she did it. Besides, I'm not her. God, I should've asked her-"

Jeremy grabbed Bonnie's arm and turned her to face him. "_Bonnie._"

"What, Jeremy? We have to go." She started to move, but Jeremy took hold of her other arm.

"No, we don't. It worked. I know it did; I felt it. They did it."

"Well, still, we should-"

"Can you just stop for a second?"

She looked at him for a couple of seconds before shaking her head. "No." She got out of his grasp. "No," she repeated as she turned back.

"Bonnie!" She continued walking, ignoring him. "Look, you can hate me all you want, but don't walk away from me." She kept walking. "Bonnie, I can take you lashing out at me in every way possible, but I can't take you shutting me out. This...this supernatural crap can't be all _we_ have." Still no response. "Bonnie, I love you."

She stopped.

"I love you. Just...talk to me. Please."

Bonnie shook her head, looking almost imploringly at her surroundings before turning to face him. She searched his face for moments and shrugged. "What do you want me to say, Jer? Huh? That I love you? That I want to be with you? That...that seeing you lying there...on the ground...not waking up...made me want to die, too? Is that what you want to hear?" Jeremy's chest constricted as he saw the droplets threatening to fall from her eyes. "I love you, Jeremy. I do. So much. And I forgive you." To her dismay, her cheeks were wet. Jeremy moved toward her, but Bonnie raised her hand to stop him. "But it's not enough. Because I don't trust you. And I can't be with someone I don't trust." Her shoulders drooped heavily as she turned back again to leave.

Jeremy looked on at her retreating form. She was right, of course. He knew that it wasn't enough for her to just forgive him. Bonnie's trust was not easily won to begin with, so he couldn't expect for it to be easily given a second time around. He followed her to the car, and he drove as she used his phone to speak to Caroline, mainly to make sure she and Elena were alright, but also to avoid any interaction with him the rest of the way home.

So later on, when the group was together in the Gilbert kitchen, toasting to a "Klaus-free life", when Jeremy caught Bonnie's eye over the shot glasses raised in the air, and when she saw Tyler's and Caroline's arms around each other, she downed her first drink before taking a second, considering a third and perhaps a fourth.

* * *

"She had my blood in her system. She wanted Stefan to save Matt."

Bonnie ran through the Emergency Room doors, looking frantically for anyone she knew. Because just because Damon said it didn't mean it was true. Damon said lots of things. He was impulsive, he overlooked things. He couldn't have been right.

She began to approach the front desk when she found Jeremy, slumped in a chair with his head in his hands, sitting by himself. As though he could feel her presence, he looked up. Slowly, he stood, and as he rose, her heart sank.

She walked to him, still waiting for some sign that it wasn't what it seemed, that two of her closest friends were okay. He staggered toward her, and she knew there was no use.

"Matt?" She knew his chances were better. Damon had said Stefan pulled him out first.

"I don't know," Jeremy choked out.

"And...and Elena?" This was the answer she dreaded. No sound left Jeremy's mouth. He could not bring himself to speak, or to shrug, or to shake his head. Bonnie had her answer. The second of her two best friends died tonight, and she didn't know whether her third closest friend would even make it to the next day.

In that moment, and just for the night, it was forgotten that they had drama between them. It was forgotten that he had hurt her and that she wouldn't trust him. She quickened her pace and threw her arms over his shoulders. His arms formed a vice-like grip around her waist as he buried his face in her neck. Both held on to each other to keep from drowning in grief, a new kind of darkness taking over.


	6. Rearrange

"My patience has worn thin, love. Get me out of here, or your ancestors will find they've met their match in me. They aren't the only ones skilled at raising hell for naive little witches."

Klaus' words had been ringing in Bonnie's head for the past two restless days and sleepless nights. However, Bonnie's own resilience had been wearing thin as well.

_Her phone vibrated as she stood by the coffin. "Tyler?"_

_"Bonnie, the council is after us."_

_"What, "us"? What do you mean?"_

_"Alaric outed Caroline and me. They all know." Bonnie froze, all thoughts of setting Klaus' decaying body aflame replaced by fear for her friends. __"My mom and Sheriff Forbes want us to leave."_

_"Wait, Tyler. You guys can't just run! Once you start, you'll never be able to stop."_

_"I know, Bonnie." A pause. "I have another idea. But I'm gonna need some help."_

_Greta. Alaric. Possession. Bonnie watched Klaus as she listened to Tyler's plan. Caroline would probably hate her for this, but at least she'd be okay, and so would Tyler. "I'm in."_

Since that night, Caroline had found out the truth; Klaus' powers of impersonation only extended so far, and Caroline Forbes was too perceptive for Klaus' deception to last too long. Though her initial reaction involved a lot of _"God, Bonnie, what the hell were you thinking?__"_, she understood why Bonnie did what she did. However, she'd been really hard on herself for not recognizing Klaus in Tyler's body sooner - as in before Klaus had taken advantage of the situation. So she'd been somewhat distant. It was only after Bonnie had sat her down and hashed out Caroline's frustrations at the situation that the latter had shifted her focus from blaming herself to breaking down Klaus' resolve to stay in Tyler's body and helping Elena.

Since that night, she had been helping Stefan aid Elena's transition and adjustment to her new, undead life. That night, when the Salvatores had explained to her and Jeremy what had happened, the first thing she did was make Elena a day walker ring. Aside from that, Bonnie had stayed out of Stefan's and Caroline's way whenever they were working with Elena, whose eyes would light up with hope that if their friendship could survive everything else it had endured, it would survive this, too. Bonnie had made her presence felt just enough to let Elena know that she wasn't turning her back on the doppelganger.

Since that night, Bonnie's time had been divided into four parts.

She had kept up the pretense of her normal life. School, grades, waiting for some indication from her father that he remembered her. She tried to convince herself that it was a good thing he had avoided talking to her since he forced her to visit their family last summer. Staying away meant he was safe.

She had tried to figure out how to free Tyler's body of Klaus without killing Klaus' bloodline. So far, she'd had reservations. Returning Klaus to his own body meant she would have to restore it to full health first. It also meant resurrecting the threat he was, and with his doppelganger dead, the Original hybrid was bound to be more than a little trigger happy. Not to mention, the power it would take would poke and prod at the gate she had tried to seal shut, the one she'd cracked open when she'd stopped Jeremy's heart to desiccate Klaus. She didn't know if she could handle that, and frankly, she was scared to push it.

She had searched for a way to reverse vampirism. Elena, Caroline, Tyler...If she could just find a way to give them their old, human lives back, she could just kill Klaus, and her other concerns would be a moot point. She hadn't decided yet if she would present the option of becoming human again to the Salvatores if she were successful. She hadn't decided yet what to think of either one of them, period.

She'd tried to be there for Matt. Matt had held himself responsible for Elena's death, and Matt Donovan had a tendency to beat himself up quite a bit over all things Elena Gilbert. Bonnie had stayed by his side at the hospital after the accident, praying to whatever power would listen that she would not lose her third closest friend. Matt was the only guy in her life who Bonnie had always truly considered family. So when he was unconscious, she held his hand and slept in the chair by his hospital bed. And when he came to, she tried her hardest to make sure he didn't beat himself up over what had happened to Elena, eventually launching Damon across his own living room a couple of times for being so vocal about his disappointment over how the quarterback had survived over his precious unrequited love.

Bonnie was stretching herself thin, and she knew it. It didn't help that she had been ignoring the witches' hisses and whispers. They were retaliating. Accidental kitchen fires. Turning the water scalding hot while she tried to shower. Breaking down her car. And nightmares. The nightmares were the worst. She would find herself rubbing her eyes and face hard every morning, trying to rub the image of yet another dead person from her mind.

It didn't help that she came home now to find her father's car in the driveway.

* * *

Jeremy had been a different story. While Matt had blamed himself, it seemed that Jeremy was angry with almost everything and everyone. He knew that Bonnie didn't know how to approach him. He had made it clear that he didn't want to talk; he was tired of talking. He was tired of a lot of things.

Restless, Jeremy grabbed his keys. He'd only ever truly found peace with one person. He headed toward the Bennett house, unsure of what exactly he thought he would accomplish by doing so but knowing that it was the only way to keep himself from going out and doing something stupid. It was selfish of him, he knew. He shouldn't try to push himself into her life, but he'd lost so much, and he needed her. They hadn't talked much since Elena turned, and he'd been busy coming to terms with the last of his family becoming the one thing he was growing to hate. Maybe he'd see what Bonnie was up to, see if he could help, because if there was anything he was sure of, it was that with everything going on, Bonnie would be busy trying to fix things, and she'd probably be doing it alone.

As he approached her driveway, he saw her walk toward her front door. He pulled into her driveway, finding a third unfamiliar car parked. Jeremy stepped out of his own car and followed Bonnie.

"Bonnie!" He found it a little unsettling when she turned to him; she looked like she hadn't been sleeping much.

"Jeremy? What are you doing here?" Bonnie really just wanted to sleep, but she knew that her father's return meant it would probably be a long, long night.

"Hey, are you okay? You look a little..." He didn't really know what to say. Tired? Sick? He wasn't sure what to say to her without rubbing her the wrong way, but her appearance worried him. He'd seen this before.

Bonnie turned back toward her door. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just need some sleep, I guess. And I think my dad's home, so..." She didn't have the heart to tell Jeremy she wasn't in the mood to be around anyone, let alone him, not after how things had been for him lately. But she also needed recovery time herself. Not to mention, she hadn't expected her father home, and if their relationship over the year was any indication, it was going to be a long night. So it was to her dismay that Jeremy was walking her to her porch. "Did you...Umm...Was there something you...?"

Jeremy was silent for a few moments. "Nah. I was just...you know." He shrugged. "So...your dad, huh?"

Bonnie sighed as she opened her door. "Yeah, so now's really not-"

She flicked the light switch. The two froze.

Her father's body lay in her living room in pieces, scattered among the body parts of every family member she had.

Sanguine letters dripped across from them on the wall: "Never turn your back on your sisters."

* * *

Note: So I'm not too happy with how this turned out. I've been having some serious writer's block and this was my way of trying to push over the slump. In addition, the show has been rubbing me the wrong way a little so I'm trying to renew my inspiration. Please, please review, and if you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them.


	7. Regret

Any part of the floor that wasn't concealed by a body part was instead coated with blood, thick and flowing slowly across the floor toward the front door, where Bonnie's feet were planted by shock. Mere seconds had passed, but Bonnie could have sworn later that night that it had been hours. It was as though if she could stay perfectly still, none of the scene before her would be real.

"God," Jeremy breathed. Words evaded him as his mind blanked. He closed his hands around Bonnie's shoulders, which he realized were now trembling. "Bonnie." He started to pull her away. This shouldn't have happened. Not to Bonnie. _This shouldn't have happened._ The young woman before him had already determined that she would give herself up to the greater good. She didn't deserve for this to happen, and she shouldn't have to look at it now. The sight was beyond sickening to him, so what must she have felt? This was her family. In one fell swoop, Bonnie had just lost her entire family.

She made to take a step into her living room. She would have found her face inches from her Aunt Gina's head - sitting a foot away from her limbless torso on top of her cousin Jake's solitary right arm - if Jeremy hadn't wrapped his arms around her when her knees gave way.

* * *

_Soft footsteps padded down the stairs, so quietly that she could have been floating. Perhaps she had been and didn't know it. Today she turned seven. That gave her four years to know that expecting her father to acknowledge her birthday, let alone to celebrate it, was like expecting a bee to kiss instead of sting you._

_She had made that mistake on her first birthday after her mother had left. She still had the scar on her back where the glass coffee table had broken skin after her father had grabbed her roughly by the arm and swung her toward it. He knew he hadn't meant to harm her; he'd had a lot to drink for the second night that week and just wanted to be left alone. He'd wanted to be left alone every night since Abby had walked out of their lives, and she should respect his wishes like a good daughter would. That's how her seven year old mind had rationalized his attitude towards her. The truth was both of them were happiest when they stayed out of each other's way. So she made it a tradition to wake up early every year on her birthday to have a little party of her own before he woke up._

_Like every year, a white box from Mariana's Bakery sat on the kitchen table, lid open. She perched herself in front of the box and opened it to find a personal-sized chocolate cake with cherry filling and butter creme icing, yellow cursive spelling "Happy Birthday, Bonnie! Love always, Grams" on top. A lit candle stood in the center. How it did so for at least an hour - as Grams sneaked in before work to leave it for her so she'd find it upon waking without her father's knowledge - without melting the wax was something she'd just accepted, never questioned, a practice she followed with everything her Grams did. A toothy grin spread across her face as she blew out the candle and cut her cake, celebrating her birthday in solitude. _

* * *

_The ride home, just like the ride to her father's brother's house, was completely silent aside from the hum of the engine. The summer reunion with her father's family had not gone the way he'd hoped. The plan had been to expose his daughter to complete and utter normalcy with the hope that she'd give up her mother's family's heritage. However, all his family had accomplished with their mundane behavior and conservative views was to frustrate her further to the point of anger. So many things she wanted to say to him. So many times she wished she could tell him how she always felt like the last resort after Elena and Caroline when it came to guys, how happy she finally was with Jeremy, how much Grams had meant to her with or without magic involved, how scared she was of what she could do or what she had to do. But her father was a hardheaded man; his way was right and that was that. He saw his last shot at a normal daughter was gone, as was her last shot at having a father in practice and not just in name. So the day after they returned to Mystic Falls, she went to see Caroline, Elena, and Jeremy, and he booked an earlier flight for his next business trip. They went back to being strangers living under the same roof._

_Because as they'd learned a while ago, the truth was both of them were happiest when they stayed out of each other's way._

* * *

Hours later, after Bonnie had put up her walls enough to hold herself together temporarily, after Jeremy had helped Bonnie pack her belongings and the two had taken account, on Bonnie's insistence, of whose bodies lay in the house, the two got into their cars and drove to the Gilbert residence. He had spoken to Sheriff Forbes, who came to the conclusion that it would be best if Bonnie were away from her house and staying elsewhere when the police found her house aflame later that night. The news reports would include a rushed account of random acts of arson, one of which tragically targeted a reunion of the family of sole survivor Bonnie Bennett, who had fortunately been staying with a friend.

Jeremy and Bonnie carried her bags into what would indefinitely be her room. Jeremy moved to open her bags to help her settle in.

"It's okay, Jer. I'll do it," Bonnie mumbled.

"Bonnie-" Jeremy moved toward her. She tensed.

"Jer, I'm-"

"Bonnie, look-"

"Jer!" The two looked at each other searchingly. Bonnie took a breath. "Sorry, I just...can I be alone right now?" She looked at him imploringly. Jeremy sighed.

"You sure?" She nodded. "If you need anything, just let me know, ok? I mean it, Bonnie. Anything." She nodded again, and unwillingly, Jeremy walked out. She closed the door and pressed her back against it, steadying herself as she waited for him to go downstairs or to his room.

Bonnie looked around the unfamiliar room. Oddly, she'd never been in the Gilbert guest room. Now, it was her room. She felt suffocated and turned to the door. "Jer?" she called out as she opened the door again.

Jeremy stood leaning against the wall of the hallway merely a few feet from the door, his thumbs hooked in his pockets. Bonnie chuckled despite the tears trailing down her cheeks.

"Thought I'd stick around just in case," he said softly.

Bonnie ducked her head, nodding for a second before moving to him. Jeremy straightened up as Bonnie pressed her face in his chest, his arms encasing her. She buried herself in his arms further, trying as best as she could to shut out the harsh whispers and cries of ghost of witches past ringing in her mind. If Jeremy happened to look down at her neck and hands at that moment, peeking from under her blouse he would have seen inky black veins bulging slightly from her skin before concealing themselves again.


End file.
